A Boy Named Sue

shel silverstein

my daddy left home when I was three
and he didn't leave much to ma and me
just this old guitar and an empty bottle of booze
now I don't blame him cause he run and hid
but the meanest thing that he ever did
was before he left he went and named me "Sue"

well he must o' thought that is quite a joke
and it got a lot of laughs from a' lots of folk
it seems I had to fight my whole life through
some gal would giggle and I'd get red
and some guy'd laugh and I'd bust his head
I tell ya: life ain't easy for a boy named "Sue"

well I grew up quick and I grew up mean
my fist got hard and my wits got keen
I'd roam from town to town to hide my shame
but I made a vow to the moon and stars
that I'd search the honky-tonks and bars
and kill that man who gave me that awful name

Well it was Gatlinburg in mid-July
and I just hit town and my throat was dry
I thought I'd stop and have myself a brew
at an old saloon on a street of mud
there at a table: dealing stud
sat the dirty mangy dog that named me "Sue"

well I knew that snake was my own sweet dad
from a worn-out picture that my mother'd had
and I knew that scar on his cheek and his evil eye
he was big and bent and gray and old
and I looked at him and my blood ran cold
and I said "my name is Sue! how do you do?
... now you're gonna die!"

well I hit him hard right between the eyes
And he went down but to my surprise
he come up with a knife and cut off a piece of my ear
but I busted a chair right across his teeth
and we crashed through the wall and into the street
kicking and a' gouging in the mud and the blood and the beer

I tell ya : I've fought tougher men
but I really can't remember when
he kicked like a mule and he bit like a crocodile
I heard him laugh and then I heard him cuss
he went for his gun and I pulled mine first
he stood there lookin' at me and I saw him smile

and he said, "Son, this world is rough
and if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough
and I knew I wouldn't be there to help ya along
so I give ya that name and I said goodbye
I knew you'd have to get tough or die
and it's the name that helped to make you strong"

he said: "now you just fought one hell of a fight
and I know you hate me and you got the right
to kill me now and I wouldn't blame you if you do
but ya ought to thank me before I die
for the gravel in ya guts and the spit in ya eye
ause I'm the son of a bitch that named you Sue"

I got all choked up and I threw down my gun
and I called him my pa and he called me his son
and I came away with a different point of view
and I think about him now and then
every time I try and every time I win
and if I ever have a son I think I'm gonna name him ...
... Bill or George! Anything but Sue! I still hate that name!


[if you want to keep the image of a big, strong man: don't
read further, but visit TAB page for a brief ...]


FATHER OF A BOY NAMED SUE

yeah I lef' home when the kid was three
and it sure felt good to be fancy free
tho I knew it wasn't quite the fatherly thing to do
but that kid kept screamin' and throwin' up
and pissin' in his pants til I had enough
so just for revenge I went and named him Sue

yeah it was Gatlinberg in mid July
I was gettin' drunk but gettin' by
gettin' old and goin' from bad to worse
when thru the door with an awful scream
comes the ugliest queen I've ever seen
he says "my name is Sue! how do you do" then he hits me with his purse

now this ain't the way he tells the tale
but he scratched my face with his fingernails
and then he bit my thumb and kicked me with his high-heeled shoe
so I hit him in the nose and he started to cry
and he threw some perfume in my eye
and it sure ain't easy fightin' with a boy named Sue

so I hit him in the head with a caned-back chair
and he screamed "hey dad you mussed my hair"
and he hit me in the navel and knocked out a piece of my lint
he was spittin' blood I was spittin' teeth
and we crashed through the wall and out into the street
a-kickin and gougin' in the mud and the blood and the creme de menth

then out of his garter he pulls a gun
I'm about to get shot by my very own son
he's screamin' bout Sigmond Freud and lookin' grim
uh? so I thought fast and I told him some stuff
how I named him Sue just to make him tough
and I guess he bought it cuz now I'm livin' with him

yeah he cooks and sews and cleans up the place
he cuts my hair and shaves my face
and irons my shirts better than a daughter could do
and on the nights that I can't score
well I can't tell you anymore ...
sure is a joy to have a boy named Sue

yeah a son is fun
but it's a joy to have a boy named Sue ...